All The Snakes I've Loved Before

This past weekend The 30Yo GF and I went to the movies to see the new Indiana Jones film. I've heard from many people that they either loved it or hated it. And while I won't get into the details of why I liked the film, I can see both sides of this arguement. However, there was a scene early in the film where Indy is stuck in quick sand and the only way to help him out was to throw him a very large snake to grab onto. I basically freaked out in the theather to the delight of everyone around me.

See, I'm very afraid of snakes. If I see one in real life I basically shut down. I can't even see a snake on TV without getting crazy heebee jeebees. But that's not to say that I don't like all snakes. There is one snake that I have been in love with for ten years, and that snake's name is Solid Snake. He's the main character in the video game series Metal Gear Solid. Next week is the PS3 release of the next installment of this series, Metal Gear Solid 4. Next Thursday, for the first time in forever, I will not be in line to get my copy, and this is a very sad fact. You see, I used to be a die hard Sony lover. I had the original Playstation and then Playstation 2. But now because of the sub-par way that Sony handled the launch of the PS3, I was forced to change my colors and became a die-hard Microsoft Xbox lover. And for the most part this has been a fantastic decision. I've been able to enjoy great games like Halo 3, Gears of War, and Bioshock. Yes, I know that Bioshock is now coming to the PS3. Congrats PS3 fans. Get excited to play a game that I beat the shit out of over 6 months ago. Never has there been ever a slight bit of regret in my decision...until now.

I sort of feel like I just broke up with a good friend or a girlfriend. It's like they have decided to move on in their life and have left me behind. When something like that happens, I feel a little nostalgic. I like to look back at all of the good times that we had together, and I think I'll do that here.

About ten years ago, I was in college and I had just graduated from a Nintendo 64 to my first Playstation. It was right around that time when a brand new game was released that had a lot of hype surrounding it. That game was Metal Gear Solid. Metal Gear Solid and I hit it off immediately. The main character of the game gets dropped off in a military base that's completely controlled by terrorists and the only weapon he has on him is a pack of cigarettes. Oh fuck yeah! You spend a majority of the beginning of the game sneaking around the enemies trying not to get noticed. It's like the movie Die Hard on crack. The game play was innovative and engaging and very smart. No run and gun here. You jump out from your hiding spot, and your dead. It's that simple. Quickly you start to see that this is just not some simple terrorist occupation. There is more to this than meets the eye, and the same is true with the game as well. It's more than just sneaking around and killing enemies quietly. Oh no. The head terrorists are American elite super soldiers and each one of them has a deep rich back story and special abilities. As Snake gets deeper into the game, he confronts each one of these bosses, and each battle could be a final battle of the game. They are that memorable.

Fast forward to the end of the game and Snake realizes that the terrorists are led by his engineered half brother, called Liquid Snake. They have taken this base to capture it's main prize, a bi-pedal walking tank with the ability to launch nuclear weapons. This monster, is called Metal Gear...hence the name of the game.

The ending was fantastic with a great battle and a great twist. I played and beat the game at least 4 times during my college years. And sitting here thinking about it, makes me want to go back and play the game again. It is definitely one of my favorite 5 games all time.

Then came the sequel...
This was a huge let down. There's really not much else to say. It was for the Playstation 2, so the graphics were much better. But this time instead of focusing on the main character, Solid Snake, you play this wimp of a character, Rayden, who just sucks in every way a main character could suck. It's like walking into Die Hard 4 thinking you get be Bruce Willis, but instead you play the wimpy kid from the Apple computer commercials. What a rip off.

Add on top of that there were so many plot twists and confusing story lines that when the game ends you are left sitting there wondering what the hell happend. "Did I just win? Is that it? That is how it ends?"At least the entire series was redeemed with Metal Gear Solid 3: Snake Eater which came out about two years later. Now calling this Metal Gear Solid 3 is a little bit of a mistake. It actually should be called Metal Gear Solid Zero, because it actually takes place long before the events of the first game. It takes place during the Cold War around the Cuban Missle Crisis and the character you play is Solid Snake's dad, the original Snake. In this game he finds himself in an Asain jungle and he's has to stop Russain extremists from stealing the original prototype for Metal Gear and launching a nuclear strike against the United States and starting World War 3.

They reverted back to all of the great things about the original game here. You start in the jungle with no weapons and a pack of smokes. But they added a whole new element here. You need health, but also energy. What's the difference? Well, if you get shot, you lose health. If you run around the jungle for hours, you lose energy. Once all of your energy is depleted, you lose health. You can get medpacks to get your health back, but the only way to get energy is to hunt in the jungle. The most common prey...snakes. You kill a snake, you eat it, you get energy. Awesome. That's right my slimy evil friends, it's fucking pay back time!

The game ended with a fantastic battle between Snake and his mentor, Big Boss, who had switched sides to join the Russians. During the battle I remember her telling Snake about the roles of soldier. And how there are never really any allegances for a solider, just another battle. Politicians determine who is good and who is bad, but for a soldier it's always just the mission. It was a fantastic ending to a great journey...and it's the last Metal Gear Solid game I will ever play.

The upcoming release of Metal Gear Solid 4 is just another example of how Sony has really lost touch. First of all, this game should have been released over a year ago. This game should have been a launch title for the PS3. Give people a reason to buy the system. Instead, they have endlessly delayed the game to the point that it's now being released in the summer and the game is almost irrelevant, which is disappointing.

I've also been reading that Konami has been telling Video Game reviewers that in order to recieve an advanced copy of the game to review, they are not allowed to tell about how long cut scenes are (rumored to be over 90 mins), and how long the initial update download takes. That's rediculous! And lots of reviewers are refusing to review the game in response. Well done I say.

The game looks great though. I've put the trailer up on the left for you to take a look at. The game takes place well after the events of Metal Gear Solid 2. Snake looks much older, but he's the same old Solid Snake. I really hope this game is successful. In fact, I really hope the game gets ported over to the Xbox 360. Think of it as a thanks for us sending over Bioshock. I doubt it will happen, but if it does, you can bet I'll be first in line to buy it.

Until that day comes though, I'll still have my memories of one of the best video game franchises ever. Good luck Snake, hopefully you will grow old gracefully, much like the 30 Year Old Gamer.

Until next time,

- The 30 Year Old Gamer