So for the last 3 months, I've spent almost $80 to have the joy of playing some crappy games. Here is a quick review of them ranked from crappiest to not so crappy.
SoulCaliber 4 (Xbox 360)
This is seriously one of the worst video games I've ever played. To be fair I'm not a real fighting game kind of gamer. But this game is just awful. You can play as one of a bunch of generic fighters that wield just huge ridiculous weapons. You fight through a a bunch of other generic fighters and then for some reason, you fight a boss and the game ends. It takes all of ten minutes and all you had to do was hit the Y button over and over again to win. What a waste of time. And look, I'm not searching for incredible realism or anything, but when a monster of a man hits a 4 ft 10 inch woman over the head with a sword the size of a Jeep, I'm expecting a little more than her to jump back up with only 10% of her health depleted.I've also heard that this game is great to play against someone else. But these battles just turn out to be who can hit the Y button the fastest. It just plain sucks, and adding a Star Wars character to the game doesn't help it at all. Avoid this game at all possible costs.
The Simpson's Game (Xbox 360)
I'm a huge fan of the Simpsons which is why this game isn't completely awful. The game puts you in control of all of the Simpsons family. The game plays like an episode of the show where Bart finds a copy of the Simpson's game and by reading the manual he and his family get video game powers. From that point forward they find themselves in funny situations where they have to use their powers to save Springfield. Throughout each story they constantly make fun of the video game industry. I was laughing hysterically each time I stumbled across a "video game cliche" and would unlock an achievement. "ooh, an exploding barrel. How original." You even get an achievement for pressing the start button. Classic.But that is pretty much as far as the game goes. The actual game play is pretty boring and repetitive. It's just a standard platforming game, with basic puzzles and boss battles. And the story itself is so splintered that there really is nothing that keeps you pressing forward in the game. After playing the game for a few hours, I felt like I had seen everything this game had to offer and I sent it back to Gamefly. Too bad too, because there were some pretty funny scenes, like a stage where Mr. Burns wanted to cut down an entire red wood forest to make one extremely expensive toothpick.
Lego Indiana Jones (Xbox 360)
I think you pretty much know what to expect out of this one. It's Legos and it's Indiana Jones. It's really a can't miss, except it kinda does. First of all, this is a great family game. It's a great game to play with kids and parents alike. Kids will get a kick out of the Legos and parents will love the Indiana Jones nostalgia. They pay a great amount of fan service to Indy fans as well. You'll play all the classic scenes including the fight with the big bruiser from Raiders of the Lost Ark who got a little too close to an airplane.The only real issue I have with this game really isn't with this game at all. I guess it's with the Lego games in general. I feel like I've been there and done that. It seems like I've done all of these puzzles before with the Lego Star Wars games. It's the same push this block here, dig up these blocks here, put these pieces together there and a door opens which you get to go to another room then repeat as necessary.
Also, Indy's whip is completely useless and feels very tacked on. I mean you'll walk onto a screen with just your whip and 7 Nazis with guns will come running from the other side and kill you before you can even get to them to hit them. It's like bringing a knife to a gunfight.
I beat the Raiders of the Lost Ark stage and I might go onto The Temple of Doom, and again I might not. The game is fun, but I always seem to decide to do something else than continue playing it.
Resident Evil 4 (Wii)
Besides Call of Duty 4 this was by far the best game I've rented from Gamefly. Although the graphics are definitely last generation, it's still genuinely horrifying to play this game. I haven't played this game long, only like 4-5 hours, but the story is deep and involving. It's a game that at only $30, I could easily see myself picking up to own.Basically, you play as a cop who is in search of the missing President's daughter. You get a lead that she is being held in this eastern European village in the middle of nowhere. So when you go to investigate, you realize the villagers are completely homicidal and there are degrees of horror everywhere. The atmosphere they create is excellent, and there are scenes that are so exciting that when they finish you really want to take a break and relax.
The only downside is the controls. Using both the Wiimote and nunchuk controllers to move and aim and fire is very awkward and I've found myself dying many times because I just can't seem to get the controls right. In fact, after a few hours of playing the first time, I found my arms hurting because of the awkward position I had them in to use the weapons I had.
But it's a good game for the Wii which is rare, and it's the only game out of the bunch I have any desire to actually own which is even rarer.
I'm not sure if I'll continue my Gamefly membership. There are a lot of good games coming out over the next couple of weeks and if my schedule remains as busy as it has been there won't be much time to play. If my time is limited in playing, then I would rather play a good game then rent another crappy one from Gamefly.
Until next time,
- The 30 Year-old Gamer
